Y.Y

My feeling..
My feeling is it nothing important to the god.? or else.
Im so desperate.
Feel like wanna scold all of them(which hurt me before) one by one and face to face.
But is it meaningfull. NO! is meaningless.
I have no energy.
I everyday ask myself. Why I cant die now?
and then myself just let me knw that Im dare no to die.
cz I love my family. I dont want leave them.
Bcz they are the only treat me as thier sweet heart.
which wont hurt me deeply. give me a lot a lot of breath to live.
But sometimes I really hope myself can die directly.
For example, accident, kill by someone, fall down or else.
HmMmm.. but after I die everything will be fine???
WONT! I just will make my family more sad.
But can tell me I want how to be happy be fun if those fucking thing keep on distrub me?
Im not a no feeling human.
My presonality? is that suck?? or really the bitch am I?
why everyone treat me like tat???
Who come and comfort me? Who come and love me at here...!
Alone came to KL study.
In my mind just think that new environment new life.
But new life doesnt is the best the good.
Everytimes I tot that my life starting stable edi.
Must be have something come and distrub my normal life.
WHY! be pls fair la god! Sorry.